Ketchup

Hell, I don't think I have gone a week without writing before, besides my summer holiday. I'd love to catch up in a neat, thematic post, but I think I'll just go day-by-day.

Last Friday I was off work,hallelujah. I woke late and played a couple hours of poker, kyboshing any chance of getting up north in time to visit my old workplace. Funny how my nostalgia gene is always keen to take me back to places that I couldn't wait to leave at the time.

So I arrived up north in the early evening, and ended up at a student nightclub thing, surrounded by pretty girl in their late teens or very early twenties. Everyone seemed much better looking than in my university days, but then I am from the generation when the girls all wore doc marten boots,combat trousers and huge grey jumpers. Today' s male students have no idea how lucky they are to be knee-deep in scantily clad honeys who wnat to show off their bodies.

I have always thought that if I went back to university now, as a worldly-wise guy, then I would get as much sex and as many girlfriends as I could handle. Totally failing to pull at this student night dented that conviction somewhat, but I have never been one to pull at nightclubs or discos. Situations where you can talk to someone a bit are my forte.

So, I got very drunk, danced a little, had a good old chat with my mate's pleasant flatmate (she said I was 'totally awesome'!) and went home. Got to sleep about 4am.

Saturday. Hmm, Saturday. I spent much of the day mooching around my old haunts, and sitting in a couple of bars reading an enjoyable novel. For some reason, I started to feel a bit maudlin and lonely - strange, since I could have been spending the afternoon with several people if I chose to. You know, dammit I miss my ex, really quite badly. I guess this has come on because I am finally single, after having met The Girl I Was Seeing only a fortnight or so after our breakup. For all my bravado and my heartfelt belief that long-term attachment is wrong, I feel lonelier than I expected. Jeez, what a weakling.

Anyways, Saturday evening was fun. Met an old friend for a few drinks at the pub, who I can really talk to. She turns out to have possibly an even bleaker worldview than mine, which surprised me somewhat. And then we went to the party, the whole reason for going up for the weekend. It wasn't bad, but I was in bed not long after 2am as far as I remember.

Sunday, finally met up with my ex, fresh back from holiday. That was nice, but she was pretty tired and we didn't have long. I felt a little misty-eyed when she dropped me off at the station. Four hours later I was sat at home and playing PLO.

I put in three hours and made almost seventy bucks, while simultaneously bubbling in two sit and goes. I also found myself starting to feel ill - which has proved to be the story of this week. I've been feeling rough all week. I went to work Monday, had Tuesday and Wednesday off, came back Thursday abd today and have felt even worse. The doctor says I have a virus, which means there is no medicine and I have to hope a weekend of sleep, rest and liquid does the trick.

Maybe not being 100% has contributed to poor results. Monday I made an ok profit in a couple of evening hours, Tuesday, off work, I played many hours and lost over forty bucks. A few more dollars lost on Wednesday, and last night I won a princely four dollars in an hour at an internet cafe. So, not a good week, but not a terrible one. I think I have managed to stay disciplined and unemotional despute mediocre cards and results. I haven't really suffered a terrible suckout, but two or three nice pots have gone against me which would have made a big difference.

Maybe its a good thing. If my day off on Tuesday (when I played pretty much 'pro' hours) had netted me a couple of hundred dollars then that dangerous dream might have started really nagging me again. But it remains just that - a dream - until the day I have a serious bankroll. And that day is a long way off, since I have to dip into the roll again to get through to payday this month. I hate doing that. Things ain't great again. The weekend was an expensive one, and I am paying off a few small bits and pieces at the moment which are nearly done now.

A good, profitable weekend of play would be particularly useful right now, Might tighten up just a little, and do some two-tabling. Before that I must sleep. Lots.

NB I only just discovered that one of my favourite bloggers, Matt, has a non-poker blog too. It is worth a read, and I find I have more attitudes in common with him than I would have expected from his splenetic writing style.